Just Kiss Her Prongs!
by Fantasy's Whisper
Summary: Sirius hatches a plan to show Lily that she loves James...by stealing her voice! Inspired by The Little Mermaid's "Kiss the Girl". Oneshot. Complete. R


**Disclaimer: I do not own the rights to any of the characters, places, or songs in this oneshot. They belong respectively to J.K. Rowling and Disney.**

* * *

**Just Kiss Her Prongs!**

James Potter sat beneath a tree by the lake, Quidditch Through the Ages open in his lap (even though he paid no attention to it). His attention lay fully on the red-haired girl down by the shore. Her laughter drifted to him and it sounded like bells.

"Oy! Prongs! Just go over there and kiss her already!" Sirius snapped his fingers in his best mate's face.

"Sirius, I doubt that's a good idea," Remus muttered from behind the book in front of his nose. "I think it fall into the arrogant toerag category."

"Well then we're just going to have make Lilykins see that Prongsie here is the perfect guy for her!" Sirius exclaimed, the mischievous glint in his eyes said he was beginning to concoct a plan that would no doubt go horribly wrong.

James looked hesitantly at Sirius. Every time his friend came up with a plot to get Lily to see James in a better light turned out to make her hate him more. Of course James was usually stupid enough to go along with whatever far-fetched idea Padfoot had, even after Remus outlined the many negatives to the incredibly short list of unlikely positives.

"Well let's go work this plan out," James sighed.

* * *

Sirius stood behind a suit of armour waiting for Lily to walk past. He had convinced Remus to get her to walk down that hallway, since he was the only marauder that Lily would listen to. The plan was going to work, Sirius knew it. Not only had James not asked Lily out all through their sixth year, Sirius had actually gone to the library to do a research for his grand scheme.

"Come on Lily, hurry up!" Sirius murmured, his stomach was growling and he wanted to get down to the Great Hall before he died from starvation.

Just as he whispered this Lily passed by the suit of armour. Sirius raised his wand a said the spell he had looked up with confidence, _vocem perdidit._ Lily didn't even know the spell had hit her, she wouldn't know until she got down to the Great Hall for dinner.

* * *

"Did you cast the spell? Did it work? What if it didn't work Padfoot?" Peter bombarded Sirius with questions the moment that he sat down.

"Relax Wormtail, of course I did. Yes it will work. Did you give the letter to the owl?" Sirius replied to the eager boy beside him.

"I did, it should be arriving any minute." Peter replied quickly looking up for the school owl.

James sat beside Remus across from the other two. He didn't really see how Sirius's plan was going to work. Of course Sirius hadn't told James the real plan, he hadn't even told Remus, and telling Peter was out of the question because he could never keep his mouth shut.

* * *

Lily sat down at the Gryffindor table, not too far away from the marauders but far enough that she thought she would be safe from their shenanigans.

"Hey Lily, could you read over my potions essay tonight?" Marlene asked her when she sat down.

Lily replied with an okay, but no sound came out. She tried to say anything, that she wouldn't mind reading the essay, that she needed to practice transfiguration spells. No sound would escape. She had somehow lost her voice between the library and the Great Hall. Who was last the person you talked to? She thought to herself. Remus.

As she turned to look down the table to glare at the four boys, an owl landed in front of her with a small bit of parchment attached to his leg. Lily took the parchment and unrolled, holding her breath in.

_Dear Lily,_

_By now you'll have noticed that you_

_have lost your voice,_

_I have taken the liberty to help_

_you find you true love. _

_In order for the spell to_

_break, you must find your true love by _

_midnight tonight and kiss him. _

_Yours truly,_

_Sirius Black_

Lily stared at the letter in horror. What were they playing at? She held the parchment out to Marlene who quickly read it and burst into laughter. She turned to look at Sirius who was watching the two girls intently and to Lily's disbelief gave him a thumbs up. Marlene had always liked the marauders, and agreed with Sirius that Lily was in love with James even though she didn't know it.

"Well you better start kissing boys, Lil." Marlene laughed as she handed back the parchment, "Who knows what will happen if you don't break the spell before midnight, you might lose your voice for ever."

Lily clutched her throat in panic. After the panic anger flashed through eyes, before Marlene could grab her Lily got up and marched down the table to Sirius. She yanked her book bag off her shoulder and walloped Sirius in the shoulder with it.

"What the hell do you keep in there?" Sirius cried in disdain as he massaged his shoulder, "Bricks?"

Lily rolled her eyes and starting yelling at him. James, Remus, Peter and Sirius looked at her trying to conceal their laughter. Lily's face kept getting redder and redder as her lips moved and she jabbed her finger at them.

"You better get to work on breaking the spell Lil, because the book said if it's not broken forever you'd lose your voice for good." Sirius laughed as he turned back to his dinner.

"Wait, Sirius what did you do? This isn't what you told me you were going to do," James asked with panic edged in his voice.

Lily looked from Sirius to James and realized that James was telling the truth. He looked distressed and Sirius looked far too smug from his own good. She turned to look at Remus who also seemed baffled at this new development. When she got her voice back she was going to let Sirius have it. Maybe she'd send him a howler. Yes, that was how she'd get revenge but first she needed to figure out how to get her voice back. When in doubt, go to the library.

* * *

Lily reread the passage for the twentieth time. How on earth did Sirius find the book, with this spell and cast it? Actually, how did Sirius even find the library, Lily was sure in his six years at Hogwarts he had never stepped into the library. She had to commend his plan grudgingly, it was a good one. Marlene sat across from Lily working on her potions essay, a smirk plastered on her face.

"Lily, just go and kiss every boy who is a fifth year or higher. It's bound to be one of them," Marlene told her, "And if this is Sirius's plan there's no doubt in my mind that the person you're going to need to kiss is James Potter."

Lily scribbled on a piece of parchment and passed it to Marlene. _But I DON'T love Potter! The book clearly says it has to be my one true love! What if he doesn't go to Hogwarts? What if he has already left school? Or what if he's not British? He could be French or American!_

"Well you won't know that it isn't James until you kiss him so you should go for it, I'm sure he won't object."

Lily glared at her friend. Unfortunately, Marlene's logic made perfect sense. So Lily packed up her stuff and stormed out of the library in search of the arrogant, bullying, toe-rag.

* * *

"Sirius why can't I just go find her, it would make her less mad when she gets her voice back," James sighed as he sat in the row boat on the shore of the lake.

"Because, it has to be a real kiss. A romantic kiss." Sirius insisted, he sighed and added, "James just trust me okay. I actually did research on this, I went to the library!"

"Woah. Padfoot you went to the library?" James was shocked. He had never heard Sirius say those words, ever.

"Yeah, so when Remus sends Lily down here, I'll be hiding in the reeds over there. All you got to do is row her out into the middle of the lake and I'll handle everything from there, trust me okay?"

Just then they heard someone approaching from the path through the trees down to the water. Sirius dashed over to his hiding place and waited.

* * *

"Hey Lily…I mean Evans…Lily," James stumbled, he hadn't actually spoken to her in a while. "What are you doing down here?"

Lily opened her mouth to tell him that he knew exactly why she was down there, because his best mate had decided to cast a spell on her that could potentially make her mute for life. But alas, she had no voice to tell him so.

"I'm being honest when I say that I had no idea that Sirius was going to do this to you, he told me he was going to put a love spell on you like a love potion but a spell. I didn't know he was taking your voice away." James hurriedly explained, hoping she wasn't going to be too angry when she got her voice back, after all he had had nothing to do with this, he had become a victim of Sirius's as well.

Lily marched over to him and kissed him on the lips. It was a quick peck and when she pulled away she tried to say something. She still had no voice. She turned to walk back to the castle, she had been right it wasn't James.

"You call that a romantic kiss huh?' James grabbed her arm so she couldn't leave. "Sirius told me it had to be something romantic from your true love. Now I'm not saying I'm him, but I know how to be romantic."

Lily quirked an eyebrow at him unimpressed. She looked from where his hand held her arm and back to his face. Obviously trying to let him know non-verbally that she wanted him to remove his hand.

" Come on Lily, would it kill you to give me a chance? This could be your chance to get the spell lifted off. I can prove to you that I'm not such a bad guy." James pleaded with her, hoping she would realize just how much he truly loved her.

Lily looked at him for a moment. A warm fluttering feeling in stomach as she looked into Potter's eyes. A feeling she had been getting a lot around him to be honest. She had put it down to nausea but she wasn't so sure anymore. No, she knew it wasn't nausea, it was something else entirely. With a little nod she accepted James's hand as she climbed into the row boat he motioned to.

* * *

Alright here we go, Sirius thought. He waved his wand and sent the row boat from the shore into the water, the oars magically moving to slowly propel the boat into the center of the lake.

"So, first we got to create the mood." Sirius murmured, "Percussion. Strings. Winds. Words."

* * *

Music surrounded the boy and girl in the boat. Lily looked around in wonder. James was surprised as well. Sirius had really thought about this.

_There you see her  
Sitting there across the way  
She don't got a lot to say  
But there's something about her  
And you don't know why  
But you're dying to try  
You wanna kiss the girl_

Lily looked across the little boat at James. She felt like someone had shocked her with electricity when their eyes connected. She quickly looked away from him. A blush creeping up her face. Dusk had fallen, a warm orange glow settled across the lake and the moon was just visible over the mountains in the east.

_Yes, you want her  
Look at her, you know you do  
It's possible she wants you, too  
There is one way to ask her  
It don't take a word  
Not a single word  
Go on and kiss the girl_

James watched Lily intently. He had never seen her more beautiful than in the dusk glow. He saw the blush on her face and felt a stirring in his chest. His heart was beginning to race, like when he was on his broom in the middle of an intense Quidditch match.

_Sing with me now  
Sha-la-la-la-la-la  
My, oh, my  
Look at the boy too shy  
He ain't gonna kiss the girl  
Sha-la-la-la-la-la  
Ain't that sad  
Ain't it shame, too bad  
You gonna miss the girl_

James couldn't believe it. He was actually nervous! He, James Potter, Quidditch extraordinaire, an animagus at the age of fifteen, was nervous about kissing Lily Evans, the girl he had been in love with since he had first caught sight of her!

"You know I feel really bad that Sirius put this spell on you," James told her trying to break the awkwardness between them, "Maybe we could think of punishments for him."

"Turn his hair pink?" Lily crinkled her nose and shook her head.

"Okay, no," James laughed, "How 'bout we turn his robes pink?"

Lily shook her head again. He needed to come up with something better than that.

"Well how about…" James lost his train of thought as he looked into Lily's eyes, "Lily?"

Lily nodded her head. For some reason she was compelled to grab James's hand. "You know that's kind of pretty, Lily, it's a pretty name. A pretty name for a pretty girl."

_Now's your moment  
Floating in a blue lagoon  
Boy, you better do it soon  
No time will be better  
She don't say a word  
And she won't say a word  
Until you kiss the girl_

The boat drifted towards a weeping willow that was hanging over the lake's shore. James thought that they were about to go through the branches which would not be romantic in the least. But as the boat drifted closer the branches parted for them and let them into the little lagoon.

_Sha-la-la-la-la-la  
Don't be scared  
You got the mood prepared  
Go on and kiss the girl  
Sha-la-la-la-la-la  
Don't stop now  
Don't try to hide it how  
You wanna kiss the girl  
Sha-la-la-la-la-la  
Float along  
Listen to the song  
The song say kiss the girl  
Sha-la-la-la-la-la  
Music play  
Do what the music say  
You wanna kiss the girl_

The little boat ever so slowly began to rotate in a circle. Little fireflies drifted around them in a globe of soft light. James held both of Lily's hands now and couldn't keep his eyes of her face, her fiery red hair. She was so beautiful. He began to lean, but at that moment Lily turned her head to the side, full blush simmering across her face.

Lily tipped her chin down for a moment. Slowly she began to look up at James through her eyelashes. His handsome face had not moved, he was leaning towards her. There was that little part of brain saying he was an arrogant, bullying toerag. The rest of her told it take a hike.

_You've got to kiss the girl  
Why don't you kiss the girl  
You gotta kiss the girl  
Go on and kiss the girl  
_

James leaned all the way over to her and let his lips connect softly with hers. Fireworks went off in his head. It was like no kiss he had ever had before. One hand moved to the back of Lily's neck to deepen the kiss, and he realized that one of her hands was entwined in his messy black hair.

When they broke apart James grinned at her. "Lily," he murmured breathless.

"James…" Lily whispered, her lips parting in a small O as she realized she had just kissed James Potter, her voice was back, and the she knew that the fluttering in her stomach was because she was deeply and madly in love with the boy in front of her.

* * *

Sirius spied on the two people in the boat from his spot among the reeds. He heard Lily whisper his best mate's name. He had known all along that she really didn't hate him, she had just needed someone to help her figure it out.

"And they say that I'm just a pretty face," Sirius grinned as he left to go back up to the castle to spread the news to Remus, Peter and Marlene.

* * *

**Author's Note**: Hope you enjoyed! Leaving me a review would be great too! ;)


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